Taupo on a Shoestring

One of the hardest parts of being a backpacker is watching your bank balance dwindle daily without any way of topping it back up. As we approach the half way point of our ten month trip, we're already more than half way through our funds so we're trying as much as possible to fill our days with free activities rather than splashing out on the most expensive. Luckily we found Taupo was perfect for this as it quickly taught us that less money doesn't always equal less fun. 

As soon as we pulled into the town we passed a sign for a Honey Farm that offered free tastings to all visitors. As well as rinsing the honey jar counter, we tried the honey wine, honey liqueurs and all kinds of honey scented moisturisers and perfumes. By the time we left we were high on sugar and smelt divine without spending a penny.

Later that evening we drove to a park with natural hot springs available to the public. Taupo is well known for its many spas but this one was as good as any and completely free. Feeling content as ever we watched the sunset from the comfort of our own private jacuzzi pool with the relaxing sounds of water trickling from a small fall beside us. 

Taupo is home to some rather massive waterfalls too, the biggest of all being Huka Falls which originates from the same river as the hot springs. In the morning we returned to the area and followed the water all the way down until the crashing falls at the end. It's a beautiful walk and the river is so inviting but with the current being so strong we had to be careful not to be whisked away into the waterfalls ourselves. As impressive as they looked we had no desire to see them up that close! 

It's a fact that everything is better when it's free but Taupo is worth the visit even if it ends up costing you. It's a beautiful town with stunning natural wonders and definitely not one to be missed. 

Eggs, Eruptions & Extraordinary Scenes

My love for eggs is a borderline obsession so when I heard that Rotorua was famous for them I couldn't wait to arrive. The rich scent of eggs filled our nostrils the moment we turned off the highway but it wasn't long before we realised it wasn't caused by anything edible. This pungent eggy smell, more similar to that of rotten eggs than your average sunny side up, is actually caused by the geothermal activity at work within the region which releases large amounts of sulphur compounds into the atmosphere. 

I make no exaggeration. The stench is so intense that you wouldn't look insane if you were to attach a peg to your nose but once you cast your eyes on where it all comes from it suddenly seems worthwhile. On our first evening we explored the Sulphur Park closest to us, weaving in and out of the maze-like paths and stopping at each of the white plains to watch the mud puddles bubble whilst the steam rose from within them. 

The following day we spent the morning at the Wai-O-Tapu Thermal Wonderland where there were even stranger yet more stunning scenes waiting for us. We arrived just in time to witness the Lady Geyzer volcano erupt and over the course of the next two hours passed fluorescent green lakes, steaming champagne pools, yellow sulphur caves and exploding mud baths. My favourite of all was called the 'Artist's Palette', a clear lake decorated with clusters of green, orange and yellow rock which broke through the mist from the hot pools behind. 

Before arriving in New Zealand I thought that places this beautiful existed only in films or in filtered photographs but here we found an absolute abundance of them. Everywhere we turned there were the most amazing natural wonders, all with an abnormal colour or design that made them look completely unnatural. Even the forest, which at a first glance appeared to be rather ordinary, had grown on a slant so that all the trees were diagonal with branches sprouting in every direction.

Our biggest frustration throughout the day was that our cameras just couldn't do any of these scenes any justice. Whatever we tried the colours and dimensions of these incredible sites didn't seem to translate onto our screens. Although sad we couldn't capture the beauty forever, we were extremely thankful to be there to witness it firsthand and so eventually tucked away our cameras and just enjoyed the moment for what it was. It really is something you need to experience to believe and I hope you all get the chance to!

The Beautiful Bay of Islands

The first stop on our big road trip around New Zealand was the Bay of Islands, at the very top of the North Island. It should only have taken us a few hours from Auckland but we didn't arrive until the early evening - partly because we left a little late and partly because our tomtom had a mad five minutes, but mainly because we drove so slowly, giving ourselves time to take in the amazing views around each corner and over every hill. The landscapes here cover every shade of green I can possibly think of and look all the more vibrant against the bright blue skies. I lost count of the number of times we all 'wowww-ed' in unison but it felt like every other minute. 

Whilst in the Bay of Islands we stayed in a small town called Paihia, so tiny that we could hardly warrant even calling it a village but New Zealanders refer to them all as towns. A short ferry ride across the water took us to Russell, another beach town even smaller than Paihia but ever so slightly prettier. We took a picnic to the beach and spent a couple of hours relaxing there, still not quite over our jet lag and the recent late nights. The sea was a little too cold to swim in but we paddled our feet and massaged them with the soft sand in the bay. 

Deciding we should then walk off our lunch we trekked the whole way through town and up to a view point in the hillside. It was almost eerily quiet and we saw more seagulls than humans throughout the entire day. Somewhere so beautiful back home would no doubt be overrun with people but here there are so many vast open spaces, all equally as stunning and with such a small population to fill them. 

As we plan to head South we have a few long journeys ahead of us but we're actually looking forward to them now. Hiring your own car is by far the best way to see New Zealand because there's so much to stop and admire on the way that you'd completely miss if you were stuck on a bus. I'm so thankful for our little Frodo already and he's only been with us a few days! 

New Zealand, New Adventures

As our plane descended into Auckland airport, it looked as though we were landing straight onto the set of The Lord of the Rings. Endless green hills surrounded the runway, so similar to the Shire that I half expected Bilbo Baggins himself to meet us on the other side. Sadly he did not, but in his place stood Sam, a friend of a family friend who had offered to pick us up and take us back to their house where we were staying for a few days. After months of arriving in countries clueless and alone, he was as much of a hero in our eyes as any hobbit who'd saved Middle Earth. 

And that was before we'd even seen the house! This place was incredible, right on the sea front with the most amazing views out across the water. We had a double room each, a swimming pool and jacuzzi, and they'd even left a car for us to use whilst they were away on vacation for the long weekend. We felt so lucky to know people so kind and willing to share their beautiful home with us and couldn't believe how far we'd come in the last twelve hours, not only in distance but standards of living too! 

Hana and I were both keen to jump into our big comfy beds but but we had to wait up for Jodie and Erica who were due to arrive a few hours later. Having not seen them both for four months we'd have been too excited to sleep anyway! It was awesome to finally be reunited and as soon as we'd finished catching up it was as though they'd been there all along. As Jodie ran around our room chasing the giant beetles away and Erica made plans to bake fairy cakes the next day, we found ourselves wondering how we'd ever survived without them at all! 

The majority of our time in Auckland was spent organising the rest of the trip ahead. We kept ourselves busy, researching the best places, planning our route, finding a car of our own and then most importantly deciding on a suitable name for it (conclusion, Frodo.) That said, we somehow found time for some real fun too. On our second evening we enjoyed a beautiful sunset dinner followed by a wine and jacuzzi session with the girls. The third night though arguably less civilised, was even more fun, exploring Auckland's nightlife with Sam and his friends. 

We were all sad to say goodbye to the amazing house and its equally as amazing inhabitants but we'll be passing through again at the end of our trip so have it all to look forward to in the very near future. Until then we're excited for all the new adventures that New Zealand has in store! 

Exploring Reefs & Rainforests, Cairns

Everyone would like to say they've swam in the Great Barrier Reef but saying you've done it and actually doing it are two very different things and having recently discovered our lack of love for snorkeling, the latter didn't seem all that appealing. That said, we couldn't come all the way to Cairns and not do it so we soon found ourselves sailing out to the middle of the ocean to find this big old reef. 

The journey out was over two hours long but it still didn't give us enough time to psych ourselves up and get our gear on. We were two of the last off the boat, fashionably late but wearing the least fashionable attire we could possibly think of. Watching Hana bob up and down on a purple noodle and trying to talk to me through her funny looking mask, I was sure that whatever was going on underneath the water couldn't possibly be as entertaining as the scenes above. Nevertheless, I had to find out. When I couldn't put it off any longer I dunked my face beneath the surface to see what all the fuss was about. 

My first feeling was one of relief. Whereas in the Whitsundays the fish had been literally flapping around in our faces, here they swam in and out of the reefs which were at least a couple of metres down. And admittedly they were rather pretty! Once I relaxed and remembered to not hold my breath, I really quite enjoyed it. I can't say I'm a complete convert but I can certainly understand the appeal. The big problem which remains for me though is that the smaller fish don't excite me much (I have goldfish at home bigger than some out here) and if I were to see anything interesting like a jellyfish or baby shark, I'd be back on the boat before you could say nemo. In fact, that's exactly what happened at our second swim stop which was completely infested with white bulb jellyfish. Though the crew insisted they were completely harmless (even fishing one out the water and throwing it at another crew member to prove it) they still didn't look like something I wanted to share a bath with. Having spent a good half hour snorkeling at the first stop we felt as though we'd accomplished enough for one day and so climbed aboard where we had first dibs on the amazing lunch waiting for us. Win, win! 

The other 'must do' trip whilst in Cairns is up to Cape Tribulation. Whilst there we visited a load of different sites, my favourite being Milla Milla, a beautiful waterfall which is believed to be the set of Peter Andre's music video for 'Mysterious Girl' - the best song to have stuck in our heads all day, obviously. For lunch we stopped at a small rainforest area which is supposedly famous for finding tree kangaroos. We're yet to spot a single live kangaroo in Australia but we've now seen two dead ones; the first at the side of a road in Torquay and the second here, in a pie on our plates. I wasn't expecting to like it but it was actually delicious and our guide explained that eating kangaroo is good for the Australian ecosystem. As if we needed an excuse to eat something tasty! 

With the Kangaroo Cafe in such close proximity to the rainforest, I was hardly surprised that we didn't spot any tree kangaroos; if I were them I'd hide too. What was a little disappointing, however, was that we didn't see any platypus either. They're known for being shy creatures but most groups will see at least one throughout the day. Our guide still taught us lots about them though and after learning that they eat half their body weight in food every day, I not only wanted to see one, I wanted to be one too! 

We had a couple of spare days and nights in Cairns which we spent sunbathing on the Esplanade, hitting the infamous Gilligans with friends and exploring the city. It's a funny old place, more a town than a city with no high rise buildings or busy streets. The weather has been a bit crazy what with it being summer but rainy season at the same time (I still have no idea how that works) but we've managed to enjoy our time here regardless and used the wet weather as an excuse for more cups of tea with Tim Tams!

A Dangerous Love Affair, Magnetic Island

Spending Valentine's Day with a dark, handsome, loveable character on a tropical island resort is just about every girl's dream. If it weren't for the small yet significant detail that Hana's female, I'd have been onto an absolute winner. Nevertheless, I woke up on Valentine's morning feeling like an extremely lucky girl. I had my best friend by my side, a whole rainforest full of flowers on our doorstep and the best selection of chocolates in the world within our reach (Australia really has nailed confectionery!) 

In the midday sun it was swelteringly hot so we spent the best part of the day at our beachfront swimming pool, never more than a few metres away from the water. However, later on once it had started to cool we decided to hike up to the viewpoint to watch the sunset over the island. There's very little we love more than an amazing sunset! 

With our cameras and a few of the Essex clan in tow we went on our merry way. We'd been walking for half an hour or so when all of a sudden the track disappeared, replaced only by rock and muddy rubble. We should have turned around but the sun was falling rapidly and none of us wanted to miss this moment. In the name of love we soldiered on, fighting through cobwebs, hopping over ants nests, and praying that no fallen branches would slither away as snakes. 

Though the theme of our walk was more risk than romance, once we finally reached the top it no longer mattered. The course of true love never did run smooth. Almost as soon as the sun vanished behind the hill a silver full moon appeared in her place, shining brighter as the lights dimmed across the island. With the reflection glimmering on the water below, it really was a Valentine's view to die for. 

And as it happens, we very nearly did! I have no idea how we'd missed it earlier but on our way down we passed an 'Unstable Cliff' sign reading 'Do not go past this point. A rock fall might cause serious injury or death.' We'd known it was dangerous but hadn't realised quite how extreme. Perhaps love is blind after all, or crazy stupid at the very least!

Valentine's Day on Magnetic Island will definitely be one to remember. Though there was no real romance to speak of this year, there was certainly a whole lot of love for life and I'm the happiest I've been for a long time. 

Whitsunnydays!

The weather forecast for our Whitsundays tour went as follows: rain, more rain and a dash of thunder and lightening to keep things interesting. 

Having learnt that Australian weather can be a little temperamental I continued to check right up until the morning we were due to leave but there wasn't a glimmer of sunshine predicted for the entire trip. Any pre-existing enthusiasm had by this point evaporated into thin air but we packed our bags regardless (full of goon and waterproof clothing) and dragged ourselves down to the pier. A threateningly dark cloud accompanied us along the way and surely enough, just as the weatherman had promised, the first drops of rain fell the moment we stepped aboard the Tongarra. Our boat, which was to be home for the next three days, was considerably smaller than it appeared in the brochure and claustrophobia was kicking in at the mere thought of twenty-five of us all cramming inside the gally to find shelter from a storm. 

It was all the more fortunate then, that said storm never arrived. The further we distanced ourselves from Airlie Beach, the brighter it became and by the time we stopped for dinner it was almost completely clear. It was as though our skipper had abandoned all compasses and simply sailed into bluer skies. A great plan, if you ask me. 

The first evening was spent getting to know our tour leader, Henry, and everyone else on board, in particular a gobby group from Essex who we quickly befriended. We each had a few drinks but we soon found that the wavy ride was making us feel far more dizzy and drunk than any of our alcohol. 

As midnight approached Henry told us he had a marquee to put up across the decking so that we could sleep outside if we preferred. And indeed we did. The cramped cabin beds were more like pigeon holes and it was suffocatingly hot with more than one person in the room, let alone twenty odd. Charmed by the idea of sleeping under the stars we quickly hauled our mattresses up to the top and shotgunned our places in the centre of the boat where we felt the most protected. I slept relatively well, thanks to a perfect combination of wine, the gentle sway, and the lullaby that Mitch and Rich treated us to on the harmonica before bed. The same cannot be said, however, for the unfortunate few on the edge of the boat who spent their night being soaked by rogue waves and playing tug of war with the wind to keep their sleeping bags aboard. 

Despite that though, I think everyone would agree that waking up the next morning in the middle of the glistening ocean was pretty special. The water had completely calmed, leaving a heavenly stillness surrounding us and Henry added to this ethereal atmosphere by playing 'Somewhere Over the Rainbow' through the speakers to ease the day in gently. I couldn't think of a more appropriate theme tune for this moment as I stared out across the horizon, scanning the surface for sea turtles as they popped up to say hello. This certainly didn't feel like the grey and miserable world I'd woken up in yesterday. 

After a lovely breakfast we were taken to White Haven Beach, the most famous spot in the Whitsundays. It's absolutely stunning with sand so white that it looks like snow; bizarre but beautiful as it blends into the bright blue ocean and sunny skies. We took a million and one photographs between us and spent an hour or so just relaxing on the shore before heading back to Tongarra for lunch. 

The next activity on the agenda was snorkelling. It's currently stinger season so we were made to put on wetsuits and told to stay on the look out for jellyfish. The most dangerous of all, however, is completely invisible and as a sickening mixture of fear and utter helplessness washed over me, I couldn't help wishing he'd just left that part out. 

Han and I lasted about ten minutes in the coral before we caught sight of our first jellyfish just a few metres away. This one was very much visible, so big in fact that we decided there wasn't enough room in this reef for the both of us and called for help. Luckily Henry was nearby in his tender and came to our rescue before we drowned from sheer panic. 

From the safety of the tender we saw hundreds of fish and I found they looked far prettier from above the surface, once the threat of being eaten had been removed. We watched in awe, this flurry of fluorescent colours created each time they fought their neighbours for the food we threw into them. There were countless yellow and purple 'Dorys' a few 'Nemos' and a large tuna that looked unnervingly similar to a baby shark. Back on the big boat we found a school of huge bat fish that had been hiding in our shadow and the boys fed those too. I looked on, with a cup of tea in one hand and a biscuit in the other, reflecting on how pleasant an experience this was; far better to observe dry and from a distance than be down in the water wearing a stupid mask and a wetsuit, getting too close for comfort with these strange creatures. Snorkelling, I've decided, is not my thing. 

The second and final evening on board Tongarra was a little livelier than the last. Henry had saved his best attire for the occasion (a purple lycra leotard and pink headband) and dished out equally as ridiculous outfits to the rest of us too. He then split us into four groups for some team games which involved balloons, a jar of Vegemite and some rather questionable behaviour. I'd managed to burn my hand pretty badly on the BBQ earlier that evening whilst trying to use it as a climbing frame (not my finest moment) and so had the added challenge of doing it all with a freezing cold Coke can glued to my palm. Needless to say my team didn't win but it was fun all the same. 

After such low expectations, our Whitsundays tour turned out to be truly amazing. The unexpected sunshine played a big part (Tongarra 1, Weather Man 0) but even in the rain I'm certain we'd have had a great time. With activities that awesome and people that awesome, it would have been seriously hard not to.

Fraser Island on Four Wheels

Had you asked me three days ago if I'd ever driven a four wheel drive off-road through a rainforest my answer would have been no. The same goes for whether I'd seen a dingo or done the washing up in the sea. Now, thanks to our camping adventure over on Fraser Island, I can say yes to all three. And here's how it happened...

Our trip got off to a fairly bad start when we were placed in a car with six Germans. Now I have absolutely nothing against them; it's just that the extent of my German language is 'ich bin zwölf' which is approximately 'zwölf' years out of date, an indicator of how long ago I left my German lessons behind. On the bright side they were at least all female which we figured was a good thing for a camping trip with no showers and shared meals. At the risk of still sounding like a twelve year old girl, boys smell and they eat too much. 

Our only saviour at this point was that we were in the lead car which was being driven by the group's tour guide, Geoff, who spoke perfect English (being half Aussie, half American) and had a hell of a lot to say. Picture a bleached blonde Tarzan and you have the exact image of Geoff, but despite his primitive appearance he knew more about this world than anyone else I've met on our trip so far. Each question we asked was answered with a full blown history lesson which we found increasingly interesting the more we learned. He started by telling us that Fraser Island is the largest sand island in the world, similar in size to Hong Kong, and that although the surrounding water is too dangerous to swim in, the island is full of different coloured lakes, many of which we'd see over the next few days. 

True to his word, Geoff led the group straight to Lake Wabby, the island's green lake tinted by the eucalyptus oils contained in the water. The track stopped two kilometres away and so we walked the last part, trudging uphill in the sand in the midday sun. We were just on the verge of melting when we caught our first sightings of the beautiful lake across the sand dunes. Or so we thought. The closer we came we realised that this was no lake at all, but a mirage created by shadows of the trees and distorted by the heatwaves simmering from the sand. We were completely stunned. Of course we'd heard of mirages but I'd always assumed the image was exaggerated by weary and water-deprived travellers, existing only in folk stories and old fables. But here we saw it with our own eyes; a glistening lake one minute and a baron desert the next. 

It was another ten minutes or so before we reached the real Lake Wabby but it was absolutely worth the wait. The turquoise green water stands out against the bright white sand dunes and then fades into the darker green forestry behind. It's simply amazing. As we bathed in the water we stayed on the lookout for the different kinds of fish that dwell there. Those swimming out in the depths spotted catfish whilst we hung out with the smaller fish, including those which nibble the dead skin from your feet. We stayed there for over an hour making the most of our free fish pedicures and cooling off before the long walk back. 

By the time we'd climbed back into our cars we were ready to go and check out our campsite. What we found was a cluster of tents out on the open beach and a plastic sheet hung over some trees creating a communal area in the corner. For dinner, each group was given a gas stove, metal plates and a bag full of rice and vegetables. As we threw all of our ingredients into the pan my mind was already unwrapping the cereal bars in my bag but somehow we mustered up an amazing meal - stir fried rice and veg with soy sauce and sand as seasoning! 

It seemed we weren't the only ones to appreciate the food either. A whole load of dingoes joined the party, trying their luck at snatching any leftovers. We'd been warned away from them because they have the potential to turn nasty but aside from Hana who's terrified of dogs, we never felt very threatened. 

The rest of the evening was uneventful but pleasant. We found that the more time we spent with our German girl group, the more we began to really like them and it seemed the more wine they drank, the better their English became. We must have gone through a fair amount of goon ourselves too because when I clambered into my tent later that evening with nothing but a sheet for a cover and a scrunched up hoodie for a pillow I was very nearly comfortable. 

The next thing I knew it was morning and we woke up to find the others already starting on breakfast. Yes, we liked these Germans a lot! It was pouring with rain and a few of the tents hadn't survived the night so the scrambled eggs sizzling in the pan played an essential part in building the team's spirits. Hana and I offered to do the washing up as we'd slept through the cooking phase but then realised there was no running water on site. What there was, on the other hand, was a great big body of water right next to us so we dragged the dirty dishes down to the beach. With each wave that came in one plate was whisked away and another spat back out at us until we were surrounded by a scattering of silver kitchen utensils bobbing up and down in the ocean. It was certainly an experience but not an entirely successful one. 

The rain was still in full force when we left the camp but Geoff assured us we'd be getting even wetter at Eli Creek where we were heading. The minute we arrived he ordered us all to strip down to our bathing suits, run up to the top and jump straight in the water before we had a a chance to think better of it. It was absolutely bloody freezing but the beauty of the creek provided a good distraction whilst our bodies readjusted to the crazy temperature change and the current carried us back down to the beach. Despite our initial reluctance to go in, we soon decided that once wasn't enough and floated down twice more before reaching for our towels and warm clothes. 

Next on the agenda was another lake, this time Lake Allom which is coloured brown from the tea tree oils found within. Having only just dried off Hana and I opted out of swimming in this one but kept ourselves busy looking out for sea turtles, playing and posing with those that we caught. On our way back to camp we stopped at a view point at the very top of the island and from there I took over the driving, treating the beach like a highway as we raced against the tide to make it back in time for dinner. 

After a whole day of activity I was shattered and headed to bed/my tent floor fairly early. Consequently, when Geoff called sunrise at five o'clock the next morning I was already half awake so crawled out of my tent to join a handful of other early risers wanting to witness Fraser Island at first light. The view out across the horizon was breathtaking and for the first time since arriving in Australia I felt a complete sense of calm. It suddenly seemed absolutely mind blowing to me that something that beautiful occurs every day of our lives and yet we're conscious of so few. How many incredible sunrises have I missed because I've been sleeping? I made the promise there and then to experience more. 

Once the others were up on the third and final day we saw our third and final lake, this time Lake McKenzie. It's bigger than both Lake Wabby and Lake Allom and clear blue in colour but it's the sand that's truly special here. It has all sorts of magical uses such as cleaning silver, exfoliating skin and even cleaning teeth - all of which we gave a go! 

Sadly it was then time to head back to the mainland but not before I had another turn at driving, this time through dirt tracks in the forest leading back to the beach. They were so bumpy that it felt like we were on some kind of simulator at a theme park but this was real life! Although scary at times it was really good fun and I wasn't ready for it to be over.

Looking back on it the entire trip was pretty incredible. In just three days on Fraser Island we crossed an impressive number of things off our bucket lists as well as a whole load of others that we would never have dreamed of putting on there in the first place. It was a refreshing change from the beach towns we've been hopping between ever since we left Sydney which have been lovely but virtually identical in their loveliness. Fraser Island, on the other hand, was an experience like no other and one that I won't forget for a very long time. 

Noosa Part II: The Return to Civilisation

Sprawled out in the sunshine on Noosa Beach we felt like the luckiest girls alive. We'd escaped the prison camp and re-entered paradise with a renewed appreciation for its beauty. We took the opportunity to lie there all day simply marvelling at the wonders of travelling which make such situations possible.

It happened to be a Saturday so that evening we hit the bar at our hostel to see where the night would take us. There we bumped into a fellow bush camp escapee, a Swiss guy called Roman, who had decided to leave shortly after hearing we'd hustled a refund. He then introduced us to his French friend Florian, a Welsh guy called Luke and a German who nobody ever learnt the name of because we let it get to the point where it would be too awkward to ask. All we needed was an Irishman and a Scotsmen to join our drinking circle and it would've been a punch line waiting to happen.

Noosa only has one club to speak of so we weren't expecting much but it turned out to be a really good night. Highlights included getting caught up in a Japanese dance off and a nostalgic non-toastie 7/11 dash. 

The next morning left us feeling a little worse for wear but we quickly recovered once we set eyes on the pool and spa where Roman was staying. At over two hundred dollars a night this fancy resort was just a teeny upgrade from our hostel and was the perfect place to nurse our hangovers. 

On our final day in Noosa we walked down to the National Park, taking the coastal route all the way up to Hell's Gate and back. We'd been promised sightings of koala bears and dolphins but sadly the most exciting animal we saw was a bush turkey. That said, what the park lacked in wildlife it made up for in views, unveiling more and more beautiful coastline and forestry with every step. 

We're really glad we stayed in Noosa after leaving the bush camp so that we can now look back fondly on our time there, with enough happy memories to outweigh the horrific. 

Our Nightmare in Noosa

The moral of this story is to trust your gut. 

Stepping off the bus in Noosa we were met with a cluster of colourful minivans all belonging to a hostel or bush camp waiting to collect their backpacker guests. We scanned the crowd for the one named 'Gagaju' but it was a good few minutes until either of us spotted it. Dusty, rundown vehicles don't tend to stand out.

The minivan wreaked of old smoke and I was actually pleased when one of the girls sparked up a cigarette inside. New smoke is mildly better than old. As we drove further away from civilisation I had a sinking feeling that this wasn't going to be what we'd signed up for. 

The trip had been sold to us as a three day canoeing tour through the Everglades, staying at a rustic campsite in the midst of one of Noosa's National Parks. In reality, we'd paid to be stranded in the middle of a desolate forest, sharing an aluminium shack with a family of swamp frogs and huntsmen spiders. The river held uncanny similarities to the Thames but with the addition of bull sharks roaming beneath the surface. We were told they only fed in the evenings and so it was safe to swim in the day but we didn't wish to test that theory. Hungry or not, I had no desire to meet them. 

Trying our best not to complain we went straight to the kitchen, hoping that food would cheer us up. It usually does the trick and I've no doubt it would have done this time too had we actually managed to cook anything. Unfortunately, the kitchen was filthy and the only utensils available were sat in a dirty pile by the sink which appeared to be spurting out muddy water. It was at that moment we learnt that for the last three days the camp had had no water at all and even now, this murky substance was the best we would get. That meant no showering, no washing up and most worryingly of all no drinking water. The nearest shop was miles away and the only drink we had with us was a four litre box of wine which we didn't suppose would keep us very hydrated.

It was starting to feel more like a prison camp than a bush camp and there was no escape. Before we'd had a chance to speak to the management they'd all cleared off for the night, leaving us literally alone in the wild. With so much scope for disaster on site we were completely baffled that there was nobody around to help out if any problems occurred in the night. I was a little intrigued to know how we were supposed to deal with a situation like a snake bite or a bush fire but at the same time prayed we wouldn't need to find out. 

We soon decided that the only way to get through this experience was to do so unconscious so we swallowed two sleeping tablets and climbed into bed by nine. I was still wide awake at three. Apparently my fear of spiders is stronger than any kind of drug and my mind was on full alert, constantly checking to see whether the big black huntsmen lurking in every corner had crawled any closer. What was more alarming still was the thought of the spiders we couldn't see. Though the huntsmen are the epitome of terrifying tarantula-esque spiders, it's the tinier species that hold the most venom and therefore, pose the biggest threat. 

Around four o'clock I finally drifted off to sleep but at five I woke up to an unidentified animal howling outside. By six I'd made the decision to leave and when my alarm finally went off at seven I was already outside the office door demanding a refund. It took a lot of persuading but eventually we got our money back as well as a free transfer back to the centre of Noosa. Thank god. 

We've camped a number of times throughout this trip and have become pretty accustomed to shit situations but this really was something else. I long for the day when we can look back on it and laugh but until then I'll be crying in the corner recovering from post traumatic stress. Cheers Gagaju!